Freelance journalist for 20 years, dentist and forensic dentist.
Published articles in the most popular Serbian newspapers and magazines.
My wish is to promote own work in international media.
The owner of several blogs
Recommend to see: www.thebloodyellowhouse.wordpress.com
Contact skype: drsasamilosevic
E mail: journalist92@gmail.com
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You also have a few typos
Criminam – Criminals
Broke the Hand – Broke Her Hand
Honours – Honors (what is UPIU style?)
Hinseberg,. - Hinseberg.
Realized – realized
According – According
Plavsic or Plavisic – you have it both ways
Mrs – Mrs.
Favourite – favorite
1992. and crime in Srebernica occurred in July 1995. That women overstate . – in 1992, and for crimes in Srebernica that occurred in July 1995.
mrs. Plavsic’s – Mrs. Plavsic’s
I would rework that lede totally:
Bosnian Serb Biljana Plavsic (80) welcomed freedom after six years spent in Swedish women's prison Hinseberg,.
One of the oldest war criminals in the world, Ms. Plavsic welcomed freedom after six years spent in Swedish women's prison Hinseberg. She was sentenced to 11 years of imprisionment by the International Criminal Tribunal for Former Yogoslavia. During her trial she was found guilty of crimes against humanity and ethnic cleansing of the Muslims and Croats in 37 Bosnian Municipalities between July 1991 and December 1992.
And then I would move my quotes up to support my lede and nut.
And everything else Ms. Potter said.
Jacquie Kubin, Editor
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Also, please be very careful not to use opinion words in your reporting unless they're attributed to a source.
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This is an interesting issue, and you have some great reporting.
To make it an even better candidate for UPI.com, it would be best to start with "what's new," which would be your new reporting on how people feel about her getting out of jail. You mention various groups, and you have a statement from the "mothers of Srebrenica" group, but it would be much better to get actual comments from someone in the group as well as maybe a professor of current events, a sociologist, any political commentator, etc.
Would it be possible to get a comment from Mrs. Plavsic, herself, or a spokesperson for her?
Since this happened in December, and it's now the beginning of February, I'm betting that something new has happened since she was released. If she's sitting quietly at home and no one is bothering her, that would be interesting, too!
Thanks for your hard work!
Sasa is not currently a member of any groups
Donne Tempo commented on "War criminal granny defies age and victims" (14 days ago)
It seems spell check went ahead and auto corrected some errors... but you can see these.